Woman Horrified to Learn that Only Reason Local Police Have Facebook Page is for Warrantless Surveillance
BRIDGEPORT, CT- Anna Flanagan had always followed the Bridgeport Police page on Facebook, eagerly waiting to see if or when her old high school bullies would make an appearance on Wanted Wednesdays or be involved in a major drug bust.
However, after noticing the numerous tips for frivolous activities posted by other followers and the readiness with which the officers would send private messages or even respond in person, Ms. Flanagan realized that the entire purpose of the page, and many more like it, was to spy on communities without the permission of judges or with the use of warrants.
"I can't believe I was so naive," said Ms. Flanagan after unfollowing the page and blocking it from contacting her. "I was unintentionally handing over my entire private life to the state to obverse everything I do without my consent."
When asked for comment regarding privacy and warrantless surveillance of private citizens, the Bridgeport Police (and all police departments) as well as the FBI responded with the identical phrase of: "We will neither confirm nor deny such activities."
At the time of publication, our news offices were being surrounded by police helicopters and armoured BearCats with the sounds of shouting, flashbangs and gunfire in the main lobby.